Welcome to the Celebration of Life Doula Blog!​

When you are a couple, the love you share is exciting and you savor the private time you have to be with each other...uninterrupted. You work late, keep in touch throughout your day and wait to be together at the end of a long day. You plan date nights, go on vacations or weekend getaways. You are free to be spontaneous! You grab every opportunity to explore and pursue your favorite passions. Most of us are multi-tasking non-stop every day. We wait for the weekends to rest and recharge. We have routines that are familiar and schedules that are predictable. We know what most days will look like if we check our calendar. Well...that is all about to CHANGE...in a good way!!!

When you become a pregnant couple, your relationship will change and grow. Pregnancy stretches you in so many ways beyond your belly. You may become more sensitive and your partner will undoubtedly notice that they have to be more conscious of your feelings and treat you with extra tender loving care. Their life pretty much goes on as usual but you are growing their baby inside of you. You feel every kick and stretch...every hiccup! You may feel nauseous at the smell of your once favorite food while your partner is devouring theirs. Communicate your new needs with your partner continually to stay connected and promote better understanding. Let them know what is  going on for you. Invite them to share how their life is changing. Ask them about their hopes and fears in becoming a new parent. For most partners, the pregnancy only really becomes real when labor begins. They do not have the same connection to the baby as they can only experience the baby through you. You have the inside edge! Be considerate of each other. Appreciate and praise all of the little acts of kindness that your partner does for you and tell them so. It matters! They matter!! You matter!!!

When you go into labor, your partner is your lifeline...your hero...your champion! What you may not know is that your partner is just as excited and anxious as you are. They are stoic and do their best to be calm and reassuring for you...regardless of the butterflies in their own stomach. They want to support you and protect you. They want to keep you safe by being your advocate. They want to get you to the hospital and get you a private room so they can be near you to comfort and take care of you. They want you to trust them. They want to take away your labor pain and have no idea how to do that. They want to make wise decisions  and choices to give you the best birth possible. They never want to leave your side. They want to take charge but often do not know the questions to ask to get you the support you need. Show them love, compassion and appreciation. They want the very best for you! They will be stoic all the way through labor. And then...when the baby arrives...they are often a heap of joyous tears of relief that the baby arrived safely and that you are doing just fine.

When you enter the hospital to give birth, you are a couple. When you leave, you are officially parents! Your partner is hustling around trying to figure out how to get your baby into the car seat so you will be allowed to leave the hospital together. They want you to have the finest "ride" available to bring you and baby home in style. They have scurried around the house to tidy up the mess that was left behind when you flew out the door racing to get to the hospital only a couple of days earlier. They are managing friends and family who are driving you both mad with a million text messages and phone calls. When you arrive at home, they are making meals or ordering food in to feed and nurture you while you breastfeed your baby. They are scheduling visits from family so that you both are not overwhelmed with too many at once. Everyone wants to come and meet your baby and watch you breastfeed. Life is a little wild and hectic those first few days! Everyone is exhausted and exhilarated all at the same time.

You need your partner now more than ever in surprising new ways every day. Be patient as they fumble with the diaper and swaddling blanket while their eyes are still partially shut from lack of sleep. Love whatever they have cooked for you even if it is not the way you would have done it. Let them know you need them. Let them know how much you love and appreciate them and all that they do for you. Show them how important they are to you. You are beginning a whole new chapter as parents. Cherish and celebrate your partner!!!                      

I invite you to go within and meet this beautiful spirit that you have summoned into your life. There is a quickening in your womb that is so intimate that only YOU will know. This precious soul has chosen you to be its Mother. Honor this intimate bond that is forming between you. Take some private time to be with your baby as it grows. Be tender and compassionate with yourself as bringing a baby into this world is no small feat! Mother and baby are so brave to go on this mysterious journey together.

Every day, your body makes micro adjustments that are necessary as it builds your baby for you. You go through your day in total innocence not knowing all of the work that is taking place inside. No wonder you are really tired "for no reason"! You are carrying a little passenger who is using up all of your energy and nutrients to build their own body. Be conscious about what your pregnant body requires...what to eat, how much water to drink, how much more sleep you need. Pace yourself at work. Set clear boundaries about what you can and cannot do now that you are pregnant. Don't let anyone overwhelm you with their demands. Find your authentic voice and say "no" when you need to.

Protect yourself from bad news and violence...tv, movies and the internet. Do not read about difficult birth stories online. Get the birth support you need to have a happy birth. Your birth will be unique to you!

Keep your cell phone far away from your belly and baby. Try to stay away from WiFi as much as you can as the EMF waves have an effect on both of you.

Create an environment of peace, tranquility and safety from the outside world. Be careful with your language and arguments. Monitor your emotions as the baby feels everything you do...magnified! I still remember conversations I heard when I was in the womb!

Get support if you are going through difficult emotions or situations. You deserve to be heard and get the support you need.

Honor and respect fetal innocence and sensitivity. Innocence is fleeting if we do not protect it. Be its champion so that your baby can come into a safer, gentler world. Keep the peace at home and anywhere you go for the sake of the innocent baby growing inside you.

Meditate in the morning and evening by just getting still in a quiet space and focusing on yourself and your baby. Put your hands on your belly and send waves of love. They feel your love and the attention you have placed upon them. Their whole world is energy, emotion and touch. Be gentle...with yourself and with them.

Celebrate all of the "firsts". First flutters in your belly. New gentle baby movements. Sharing your exciting news of your pregnancy in special ways with family and friends. Gender reveal celebrations. First ultrasound pictures. Shopping for all the new baby gear that you will need. Naming your baby. Record all of the happy events in a beautiful birth journal to share with your baby later in life. Remember to stay innocent for as long as you can! Savor it!

This may be the first time you will need to reach out to friends and family for support. Share any fears and concerns with those who can really listen and support you.

Reserve the "golden hour" following your birth for just you and your partner before wildly excited visitors invade your sacred space. Protect your home and nursery from too many visitors when you are just coming home from the hospital. This is an especially innocent and private time for you when you might feel very exhausted and vulnerable. 

Allow yourself to be supported and nurtured. Ask for help when you need it. Accept help when it is offered. Build a soft cocoon around you and your baby to protect the innocence of your new family.

Express gratitude for the blessing you carry in your womb. Your baby will feel it and bask in its glow. Expect the very best for your pregnancy. Relax, enjoy and let your spirit soar!  

Take some quiet time to connect with your baby, visualize and plan the birth of your dreams. What is your birth philosophy? Where do you see yourself giving birth...hospital, birth center or at home? Do you see yourself having an all natural birth or relaxing with an epidural? Will you be more comfortable in the care of a doctor or midwife?

Create a master checklist of resources you will need to make important choices in your care provider, hospital, pediatrician. You have the power of choice from the beginning. Visualize yourself at your birth. Who is there? What does the venue feel like? See if it looks like a hospital or birth center...maybe even your home. It is much easier to search your heart before you move forward with a care provider. Interview your care provider to see if they share and support your vision of your ideal birth.

Research classes you will take to be prepared and feel confident for that magical day when your baby arrives. There are so many to choose from! There are group classes, private classes and specialty classes like Hypnobirthing. Your care provider can refer you to classes that will suit your needs or feel free to explore through friends or internet resources. 

Learn about Birth and Postpartum Doulas and how they can help you have the birth you truly want. Explore through friends and doctor referrals. Check out Doula websites. Interview several so that you know you have found a Doula who is passionate about supporting you and being your advocate. Have a consultation so you can learn about their birth experience, certification and support services. Ask questions and gain rapport to know if this person will help you feel comfortable and meet your needs.   

Your pregnancy and birth planning should be fun and exciting! Take the time to prepare wisely to create your ideal birth. When you have your perfect plan in place, take some time to relax and be pampered! Choose yoga classes, massage and craniosacral body work. Just allow yourself some time to celebrate you, your partner and your plan for your birth!